You're Not Doing Grief Wrong | Here's What's Actually Happening
Start here (if you’re in a rush)
If you made it to this podcast, maybe you’re starting to notice something feels “off” since your dad died. If that’s hitting close, we’re here to help you understand it.
Grief can be cryptic. It shows up while you’re waiting in line at the grocery store, or reading an email that says “just circling back,” and suddenly you’re back in moments that changed your life.
In this episode, we sit down with Greg Kettner and break down what grief actually feels like for men, why it can hit later or out of nowhere, and how to deal with it without shutting down or pretending you’re fine.
We also get into therapy, what it’s really like, why it helps, and how to find someone you can talk to without feeling like you’re being graded.
If you’ve got a minute
Maybe you’re a guy who just lost his dad and feel like you’re doing grief wrong, like there was a meeting you missed and everyone else got instructions. You’re not alone.
A lot of men decide they’re fine and carry on. It can feel easier and more acceptable, but it doesn’t work when something underneath has gone off script.
That’s what this episode gets into. What it actually feels like, why it hits the way it does, and how it shows up at inconvenient times, like when you’re trying to work.
Greg walks through it from the beginning. His dad getting sick, the hospital, the moment everything stopped, and what came after.
The moment doesn’t linger. It’s everything after. When you’re fine one minute and not the next, and you start wondering if you’re feeling too much, too little, or if this is just how it works now.
This is where a lot of men get stuck, quietly managing it as if there’s a prize for not bringing it up.
We also talk about therapy. Many men treat it like a last resort or a flaw, until they try it and realize it’s just a place where you don’t have to pretend.
If your dad is gone, or you know that time is coming, this will help you understand what’s happening in your head and what to do with it.
We’re just your friend. We’re not licensed therapists, and this podcast is NOT intended as a substitute for professional advice. We’ll see you in the next episode.
In this episode, you'll learn:
- What it feels like as a man when your dad dies.
- Why it’s so hard to process losing the person you saw as your rock.
- What actually happens in the moment he dies, and why it lands the way it does.
- Why grief doesn’t stay at the funeral and instead shows up later, in random places, at inconvenient times.
- How to deal with those hits without shutting down or pretending nothing’s happening.
- What therapy is really like, and why more guys end up needing it than they expect.
- How to find a therapist you don’t hate talking to.
- What to do if you still have time with your dad.
About Greg and his dad
Greg Kettner lost his dad a year and a half ago. His father, Sydney, was a doctor who spent his life helping other people live better. That mindset shaped how Greg shows up today.
He now speaks to organizations about mental health and stress. In this episode, he talks honestly about losing his dad and what it looks like to move forward after.
In this episode:
0:00 – Why Losing Your Dad Hits Different as a Man (no one explains this part, you just find out)
2:10 – Why Greg Said Yes to Talking About This (most guys would rather not, for obvious reasons)
6:30 – Who His Dad Was and What He Meant to Him (the part that makes the rest hit harder)
12:20 – The First Stroke and Realizing He’s Not Invincible (a very unwelcome plot twist)
18:00 – The Hospital and The Decision You Have to Make (the one you don’t feel qualified for)
24:40 – The Moment He Dies (exactly as final as you think it is)
30:10 – Why It Hits You Later (because apparently grief has a delay setting)
36:30 – Breaking Down in Public (in places you did not plan for)
42:00 – Therapy: What It’s Actually Like for Guys (less weird than expected, more useful than advertised)
49:20 – Finding a Therapist You Can Talk To (without feeling like you’re being evaluated)
55:00 – How This Changed His Life (not in a neat, inspirational way)
1:02:00 – What He’d Say to His Dad Now (the conversation you keep having anyway)
1:07:20 – Advice for Guys Going Through This (the stuff people should probably say sooner)
About Dead Dads
Dead Dads is a podcast for guys figuring out life after losing their dad.
It’s real conversations about grief, identity, and everything that comes after.
You sure aren't alone.
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New episodes every other week.